Saturday, October 22, 2005

A 'short' story and 'THE stroke of genius'

Wrote this in a short time, 3 minutes?! During the seminars. Practical exams from Monday and I'm writing this here!! My previous experiences should come in handy and no Ram here for that reassurance you guys,b@$!@^d$!

The 'short' story
His name was R.Ram. He was 5' tall. Like his name, his height was also very short. He used to cut his hair every fortnight, for he liked to keep it short. Hewas a good cricket player. While batting he used to despatch anything short, beyond the ropes. He was a brilliant fielder at short point, short fineleg and short mid-wicket bowling his main weapon was the shortpitched delivery which rose to an awkward height for the batsmen to tackle it. His memory lasted for a very short period, the time he spent in the exam hall was also very short it took a very short time for his teachers to correct his papers and he always fell short of the passing marks.

He was extremely short-tempered. His temper used to flare when his friends used to tease him for 'that thing' being short as well, owing to his short height. He used to get into serious fights over this. But, those fights were also shortlived for he lost due to his short stature deep inside he knew,'it' was indeed short.

When he was 18,he wanted a girlfriend. He wanted only a short term relationship. His wait was shortlived, for he found an equally short female. Their short relationship came to an end and they went separate ways.

While on a short walk, he came under a truck. He died on the spot. A short article tucked away in some corner on an obscure local newspaper made a mention of his death. His funeral also was very short, for he had no mourners.

The stroke of genius

This occurred to me while I was peeing in the 'hygienic', germ free, hazy(due to just then sprayed DDT to keep away the mosquitoes) bathroom. No, it was not in the bathroom. My next best idea will occur to me when I'll be peeing. This actually occurred to me while I was almost killed by an OPEL CORSA number GJ-5 PJ 5456!!. I know my death will come while crossing the road.

Pong was with me then. I asked him,"What's the most (ab)used line in personality contests?". Personality contests!, well there's another post waiting to be written on that, which again reminds me of Ram!. And Pong had some/no clue.It was 'IITIAM' or I think therefore I am. Poor Descartes must be turning in his grave! Then I told Pong something which would've made Descartes roll over 142 times in his grave. I told him-"My parents thought, therefore I am!". To which Pong replied-"My parents didn't think, therefore I am!" No offences Pong, but!!!:))

P.S Now you decide who's the bigger genius!!

Update 1: I stand vindicated in writing the previous post. We still haven't received the prize. And heard the prize money will be cut down.
Update 2: If you haven't watched Yahaan, hang yourself and ask your bhoot to watch it.Minissha(s,with that extra s)is so cute, ooeeemaa.

Monday, October 17, 2005

Nikhil ko thoda gussa kyon aata hai!!!

The test went o.k., for I had not studied at all.Then I come out of the test wondering why the hell were my classmates so tense about the test. And I'm not 'peeved' at all today, have calmed down.But since the following post was written yesterday with yours truly, squint in one eye due to the stye stressing his eyes to write it, and I didn't want it to go waste.

Nikhil ko thoda gussa kyon aata hai!!!

I'm really peeved today and Harsha has even a bigger reason to be peeved.There was an auto-fest in our college. so what? there was an auto-quiz in the autofest. so ? Me and Harsha won the quiz. ok,so? Dilip Chhabria was the chief guest.So? Winnners of all other events got to receive their prizes from the man himself or atleast had a photo receiving the prize with him in the background. So, my whine(call that if you may want it to) is that while others got to receive the prizes from him, why were we left out?

I don't know if that was deliberate on the part of the organisers to have conveniently run out of empty envelopes or was it because quizzing was considered too frivolous to be part of such an 'august' gathering. We didn't want the 'here-come-the-great-quizzers-of-all-time' kind of reception and the huge cheer and the hooting that usually follows when anyone among our group is on the stage. Have crossed that stage now! It's ok even if nobody reads this post! I hardly look for appreciation from all and sundry. But having come up with some seriously brilliant answers(no self adulation here, me and Harsha did come up some good ones-firewall,left hand drive to right hand drive, on bulldozer,Murphy,stuttgart and the horse connection- that won the quiz for us),I thought we deserved atleast some 1.2434 seconds on the stage for this quiz. That feeling of exalted elation on having worked out the Murphy question and the firewall one was something inexplicable, something which you won't understand unless you are a quizzer!Jumping out of the chair, the hi-five and the disbelief wondering what stroke of genius had struck us.I'm kinda hyper, so me doing it is ok, but when I see my brother in arms 'Power-e- illa!!' Harsha doing it, it's an unmistakable indication of us having done something really out of the ordinary.

In the end, I made a perfect jack-ass of myself when I asked one of the conveners if we are receiving the prizes, and then an announcement of the winners of the quiz is made after the vote of thanks! Couldn't have got more jack-assish than this, could I?! This post could have been laced with much more sarcasm if people whom we didn't know or we were not familiar with, had done this. But it does hurt when people who are close to you conveniently forget things.

Well, I've participated in all the quizzes conducted in the college and have qualified for the finals of almost all of them and won quite a few of them as well. But this wasn't just another quiz. You invite a profesional quiz-master, paying him a decent amount of cash. Initially, I was skeptic if he seriously deserved such a sum. But after the quiz, we have every reason to believe that he deserved all of it for the effort he put in to make the quiz interesting and at the same time putting in real good questions. I wouldn't be having any grouse if this was again one of those 'just another quiz' we have in the college.I haven't even bothered to get the certificates and prizes of those. The whole point here being, quizzing is seriously considered trivial and is given the go-by.

Quizzing is something which is more than a passion for me, and for Harsha as well. We've been partners in crime of having spent countless nights searching for silly trivia, talking for long hours about things which are of no concern to us at all, discussing things that would probably be of no use at all. Yet there's some inexplicable pleasure in knowing things which generally shouldn't be bothering us.There's a long long post waiting to be written about our quizzing exloits, the highs, the lows, the serious arguments almost leading to us not talking to each other for days!!, the 'sorry macha' for the wrong answer,University Challenge,CERN not getting us to the Mindbend quiz finals. Well,the list is endless. Our styles are complimentary,he's the quiet,reserved one while I'm the vociferous,noisy one.I've mellowed down though now,I guess. Our areas of interest are also complimentary. The best thing being , there's some sort of unstated understanding between us. All we do before a quiz is just inform each other of the timings and that 'connection' is somehow established during the course of the quiz.

I spend so much time on IMDB and Wikipedia, that if they would've been females, I'd be surely proposing to both of them.(Too difficult to choose, you see!). I think I know a thing or two about quizzing, for my quizzing credentials are decent enough and my knowledge of what I consider to be my strong areas- business,advertising, brands,politics, origins of names of brands and bands,bollywood and word etymologies, is also quite adequate. Rajiv Gandhi was offered the role played by the Big B in Bombay to Goa, imagine what'd have happened if he had accepted and played that role!!I'd have probably written this some 2145 times on my blog that I'd be better off studying Operating Systems,DBMS,Computer Networks than 'wasting' my time on 'silly' things like quizzing,blogging,debating. But that's ok now I guess.There's an O.S. test tomorrow. I was the only dumb-ass from my class(apart from Mrinabh!) running around quizzing,doing this and that.I have no idea of what I'm going to do in the test.I don't believe in doing things just because they are meant to be done. That might sound outlandish and arrogant,but that's what sets me apart from others.Hopefully,will continue blogging regularly from now on.

pre-P.s. In case you are still wondering why such a hue and cry over such an inconsequential thing as quizzing, sorry for you. That's something only a quizzer can understand.

What had i been doing all these days/what's been happening with me. not in chronological order.

1.Went to garba at the A.C dome, couldn't make it to the inDoor stadium.Garba rocks!Sad it's my last time.
2.Came third in an India Quiz, quite good considering mythology and stuff isn't our forte.
2.5 Was a witness to two farces called 'quizzes'. Schools have better stuff.One had a good-looking dumb female reading out questions correctly, the other had a ugly looking,boisterous male reading out questions incorrectly.
3.Won the debate with Hitesh at PT. It was great.We won according to the judges-'on account of better co-ordination'
4.Elections were held in the college. Internet and orkut became the latest weapon of mud-slinging.I was not involed. Mama became the GS and Hitesh, the CS. Some people had their faces deep in mud during the whole mud-slinging thing and it was sad.
5.Kashish- the official welcome for the first-yearites. Lacklustre and boring. Pandit's dance had many males and females drooling. No song dedicated to final yearites. So, we played senti-senti.Details of that to follow in coming posts.
6.Conducted a general quiz. My coming of age as a quizzer, I believe. It had no question from QFI,Quiznet or Kcircle.Fell in love with wikipedia and imdb during this.
7. My seminar on 'IT in rural development' went real well. That might just inspire to listen to 'the call of my heart' and do something for the community.
8.Sugar and Spice had 50% on the total bill.Treated people there.
9.Sugar and Spice had 'buy a burger and get the same free'. Got a treat there.Stomach upset followed
10.Listened to 'High Hopes' some 12084 times and 'Naam ada likhna' 32456 times.
11.The stye in my eye has been bothering me no ends and with that recurring headache with the viral infection doing the rounds in the college, I look like shukracharya, with one eye almost closed and also look like a prison escapee with the dishevelled hair and the strange look with one eye closed.
12. Harsha got placed in Godrej.ALL OF US ARE PLACED NOW.IBM,Cognizant, Wipro,Godrej,Sterlite beware!
12.25Haven't cut my hair for about three months now. Plans are to grow it even longer.Not finding a decent reason to cut my hair.
12.5 Watched around 20 movies.
13.Parents,sister,aunt and kid cousins had come to visit me.Took them around in the college.Surat is one hell of a place for textile-shopping.It can make you go insane.They were happy to know that I'm quite well-known in the college!
14.Yours truly along with Jayanth and Pragnya, as bloggers made it to the papers. TOI actually, its South Gujarat Edition.will take a photo of that and post.
15.Missed the treasure hunt as I was with my folks. Skunk said I din't really miss it!Me and Bharath have won it twice in the last three years.
16. Did the 'Bollywood Auto quiz!' for this Autofest.It's a real good one. Will post here if public demands.
17.Exhausted SMS worth Rs. 2000 in 20 days!Airtel Guj has this offer- sms worth 2000 for 100Rs.Have rechaged again if you want to be pestered with my PJs and live accounts of my labs,seminars and submissions, send me your number!
18.Followed thisregularly.What's your take on that?