Literally speaking!

Everything appears funny when words start taking their literal meanings. It has definitely been a long time since I last blogged. Twenty three days of course is a long time. During a period of twenty three days, I could have grown my hair longer by 7.8642 cm, Pandit could have changed his phone number five times, Sajani Mrinalini Dutta could have lost and found her gawarat in the hinterlands of Gujarat hundred sixty eight times, Bharath could have joined IISc and have interestingly started to get deeper insights into the working of the stock markets and Seth Mota could have started working his way up the political ladder at IIM-K, when not preparing a marketing plan for the ready-to-eat segment.

All of the above have happened except for my hair getting longer. I know 7.8642 is way too exaggerated, but sadly I had to cut my hair short by 4.8173 cm, out of regard for my parents and all the prying aunties in the neighbourhood. But it's just not about the hair. When I think of it now, losing my hair is a very small price to pay for all that I gained in the last twenty three days. Oh, with all the Hair raising tales doing the rounds, I better be careful with the (ab)use of Hair.

Now getting back to the subject of words taking their literal meanings in my life, I'm again not lying when I say I've come a long way since I blogged seriously the last time, or so I'd like to think. I guess I now know why words have started taking their literal meanings.It is because I work to promote literacy.

So while I am yet to digest all that I've had over the last three months, food and otherwise, I'll try to recapitulate and live those wonderful moments through this blog. Everything that happened seems to me to be straight out of a movie. Not surprisingly though, most of those experiences have to deal with movies and people connected with movies.[ Well, it's a little more than that, we had been to a film shoot and interviewed a couple of them. Also came across and met a couple more. More on that in the coming posts. But it was definitely fun asking Pampam Khair to produce more movies like Maine Gandhi ko nahin maara, and sympathizing with him with a grim smile on my face, when he told me that he had to do films like Half key cutterso that he could survive first and then think of producing good movies. [ There you go. Figure out the name of the movie. Rhymes with Half key cutter]. It was also fun complementing Lillette Dubey for her grace and the way "she carries herself so sensibly in her movies", to be returned with as shocked stare, probably wondering which alien from Pluto was addressing her by her first name. But then, more horrible things have happened on this earth than Lillette ji being addressed by her first name. Like, one Mr.Patel at the counter at the State Bank of India, SVRCET Surat branch, having this horrible idea that I molested his daughter. That, I realised in one of my wonderful dreams aboard SpiceJet, which was cut short by the eye-candy air-hostess offering me a toffee, was the reason for him to delay the closure of my account and let me have the money. Of course, I did have my money and I had not molested his daughter. I just hope Jaswanth Singh sees no mole in this whole molestation affair!

Of course, Lillette did take it in her stride and thanked me. They were definitely other well-known actors and actresses, surrrounded by equally great actors and actresses with superficial smiles and greetings. Make up, not to mention was equally superificial. Apart from My.Khair and Madame Dubey, they were plenty of other stars. There was one Mr.Axay Cunha and one Mr.Sue-kneel Chatty. Also present were
Ms.Humeesha Putt-tail and the really high-nosed Ms.Bianca Cobra. More on my brushes with glamour and my powdery thoughts on those later. I think it all began with the fashion show I hosted for G-3 in Surat. While I contiune to enjoy those, I long ago realised that the glamour and beauty is plain skin-deep. As long as there are people who clamour, there will be glamour. Take this incident involving Bipasha Basu for that matter. While that was in New York, I just came across her shooting an ad for a well-known retail chain together with Zayed Khan. She must thank her stars(now, which stars would the stars themselves thank?!) for her shooting being scheduled in Pondicherry. Except for a bunch of young students who were curiously watching and waiting for their autographs, no one was really bothered. The only khan that people here probably know is khaan-a, which the hoteliers have to learn to humour the tourists. And Bipasha would probably be Prakasha's sister or daughter. So, I have all the reasons for being excited at the prospect of watching KANK later this evening. Just hope it is not dubbed in Tamizh. Now would KANK be called TANK if it were dubbed to Tamizh?

P.S. I see signs of my old senseless writing skills returing. These are good signs. Especially the ones with ball pens.

P^2.S. There are a zillion stories/experiences/anecdotes/inside jokes to be told. Do not know why this post took off on such a tangential and ended up just talking about Bollywood and my experiences relating to that.

P^3.S. I definitely need to spruce up my blog. Introduce a bunch of bloggers, change the template, before it is too late start posting more regularly with posts that indeed make sense.

P.^4.S Heartening is that I now seemed to have regained my pathetic sense of humour.
Samples:
1. What will you get if you put spices in Paayasam?
Spaayasam
or this
2. Every girl waits eagerly for a young man, always having these four words on
her lips - Ming, ming, ming and ming. Who is she waiting for?
Prince Char-ming!
P^5.S. It's ok. I'm fine. You can hit me when we meet the next time.
P^6.S. Read in the last month -
India Unbound

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night- Time

It's Not About the Bike: My Journey Back to Life


Now reading
Eats, Shoots and Leaves"

P^7.S. Watched Corporate, Yun Hota Toh Kya Hota and Anthony Kaun Hai. The only three Hindi movies I've watched in the last three months. I should hang myself twice over for this blunder. Anyway, two of these had Minissha Lamba starring in them. So that starry-eyed feeling of watching lambda, err Lamba come alive on the big screen more than compensated for not having watched atleast 15.8 Hindi movies. Hitesh, I still absolutely adore her irrespective of what you said Yahaan!

P^8.S. Just a mental note of the places, people, events, experiences, inside jokes et al. Very random. Might not make sense, like everything on this blog.

1. Watching WC semi-finals and the finals with the actual citizens of respective countries at Coffee.com in Pondicherry.
2. Going around Dadar,Haji Ali , Worli and Mumbai Central with Harsha.
3. Dinner at Priya's place.
4. Lunch at Kaak's place.
5. "Sir, we have free seating. You can sit wherever you want!"
6. "Anyone order, Sir?"
7. The night with Das at NMIMS.
8. Dinner at Trishna.
9. Scott's departure from Mumbai. Turns out that it is him who is indeed forgetful. How else do you then explain him forgetting his bag containing the passport and the plane tickets? And the sin of forgetting GoodDay biscuits is unpardonable!
10. Scott,
Fellow, missing you big time. No my watch hasn't gottten any bigger. Daily Bread, Kaarthik, #3, St. Louis Street, Pondicherry aren't the same without you. Life is funny. We are even funnier. There's Skype anyway.
11. Stay at IIM-A. The brief meeting with Fidoe and the dinner(s) with Vandana.
12. Rajasthan was one experience which will take sometime to register its fullest impact on me. It will definitely come out on this blog. Life, in its different forms, in its brightest, darkest colours, was thrown wide open, right in my face.
13. The city visits - Chennai, Bangalore, Mumbai, Pune and Ahmedabad.
14. "She's grinding millet"
15. Meeting Sidin and Fungus. Find Fungus's article on Hafta here.
16. Visiting home and celebrating Ganesh Charurthi, albeit briefly.
17. The adventure trip to Dandeli with Pandu, Sandy and Raghuram. Wonderful feeling cycling twelve kilometers through the jungle and then going for an actual Safari.
18. Later