Back with 'back again'!

I'm back after exorcising some demons inside my head. I'm feeling much better now having accomplished that, and what makes me more glad is that I did it all alone. I went to some people looking for answers and realised most of them lay within me. Realsied that running behind/with the crowd just doesn't help in my case. There are some inherent 'quirks?' and inexplicble contradictions which only I possess and there are some things which I do and have perfect explanations which appear totally convincing to me and I guess that is what matters most at the end of the day. Raghuram has more faith in me than I do and it is vice versa I guess!

Expect more of such philo'soupy' in coming posts!!

Hope the purgation is successful.I realised that there's no point geting stuck in a hole and then complain, crib about how things are not going on well. The best way to come out of the hole, I thought was to attend some classes and resume the old routine of writing poems sitting in the last bench, with the teacher wondering as to why am I the only one taking down notes. I finished the book that I was writing my 'class notes' since third year and had to borrow a page from Lakshman to write this poem.


Geometry of life

They say life comes a full circle, but why is it that,
I feel like it’s back to square one,
When what I’ve been through is just a semicircle.
Yet they say, angle in a semicircle is a right angle!

You and your goals become parallel lines,
You’re stuck in a maze as complicated as a dodecahedron.
Life goes into the third quadrant and people suddenly become obtuse
Your sorry state turns more acute and the cylindrical cup of woes overflows.

You pause and reflect, wondering why
The angle of incidence is not equal to the angle of reflection.
And realize that life isn’t governed by laws of Euclid or Euler.
That there are paths longer than the hypotenuse, and shorter than the diagonal.

You feel you are living on the edge,
Length breadth and height of desperation threatening to multiply,
You sit back, contemplate and analyze your graph
And then that diminishing flicker lost in some vertex of your heart,
Tells you to look at life as a trapezium.

Hope and faith the parallel sides, always running along.
All you need to do extend the non-parallel ones,
And don’t they meet, that extension needing tonnes of patience and hard work.
So clear your mind, start from the base and work your ass off!!
- Nikhil
23/09/05

a Kit-Kat break

I am completely lost for words. The earlier enthu for writing is longer there. Need to get serious on certain things, and even if i don't want to,am having to spend less time of some things quite close to my heart(enough of listening to my heart, my mind tells me), blogging for example. I seriously don't know why has this numb feeling overpowered me and I know I'll overcome it and be 'normal' again cracking pathetic PJs, rubbing people the wrong way with my stupid posts, coming up with those silly poems and stories written sitting in the last bench with some sensible posts interspersed here and there.

Thankfully Bharath has a digicam and Mrinabh, a mobile cam. That means my photoblog will be updated regularly. Keep visiting that. But I just can't conjure up enough energy and brains to write though there is no dearth of subjects that I can write on. The photoblog will be running though.

No time to search the world around
Cause you know where I'll be found
When I come around
When I come around

-When I Come Around(Green Day)

In the meanwhile discovered some more bloggers, want to add their blog links in the links section, make my blog look nicer..but just can't..the numb feeling you see..

Shayon- my-labyrinth.blogspot.com

Komal- meriawazuno.blogspot.com-do visit her blog for her story of the deluge in mumbai.

A fellow quizzer, UC participant-Almost useless!- lifesucz.blogspot.com

and page 3 of blogging...meet rahul bose, deepak chopra, mallika chopra, rahul khanna, nandita das,shekhar kapur, anupam kher, milind deora, vandana shiva,kanika chopra and many more on intentblog.com

till my next post
nikhil

The battle heats up-Microsoft CEO: 'I'm going to f---ing kill Google'

my shift key has a problem, so no 'capitalised'(exactly..that's what one of our teachers said..all keywords in java should begin with 'capitalised')letters and my mind's not working. i donno the reason. is it because of the excess of movies that i'm watching or is it because i'm attending more classes this time!



continuing on the google-ms war, here's a piece i stumbled across on slashdot. it is a great site for people who are intersted in tech-trivia. they call it a site for nerds and i don't quite consider myself to be one. reminds me of one funny incident though. microsoft came calling to our campus for recruitment and i thought my knowledge of msn spaces, the mappoint technolgy would be of some help. and as it turned out i failed to clear the 'written' test which was quite 'technical'. that's ok as i don't quite fancy my chances with things 'technical'. but what amazed me was that even in the interviews that followed, there was not even a single 'hr' question. it was pointers, arrays, data structures, algorithms, compilers all the way. and this idiot thought his hours of meandering around the world wide web would be of some help! how naive of me! sometimes i feel i should have drowned in object oriented programming than spend time deriding bush's objective of occupying iraq. but surprisingly, when pause for a moment,i don't repent what i did! thinking that that one hour test would have made a difference of around 3.5 lacs to my annual salary!!was just wondering what makes the differnce? that duration of one hour of the test or the 'wasted years' (that's also the song playing rt now!, how ironic!!!..f*&k..the song is by iron maiden!!now my mind's working!!). to me it was that one hour that made the difference. my thoughts on placements din't go down well with many people here(like most of my thoughts!). and i hate to talk/write about placements, but couldn't miss this one as it was about ms.congrats siddharth!

google is also planning to come out with an operating system to challenge windows.
(writing 'remember i told you this first' sounds like crap to me now!!)let's see.

will post a list of movies/books that i've drowned in of late. talking of movies, am planning to start a blog on the 'other bollywood' ,the sensible indian cinema, indian movies in english, not the american desi, chai types...my gyaan of such movies is decent enough...and want to 'specialise' in that.just like my photoblog on hoardings, posters and notices!

if anybody can get their hands on cds of the following please write them for me. all freight charges will be borne by me.

war and peace- anand ptwardhan
matrubhoomi- manish jha
is raat ki subah nahin- sudhir mishra
black friday-anurag kashyap

A trip to 'shanivari'

I guess every city of has its own 'bazaars', 'markets' or 'shanivaris' as we have in Surat, where you get everything you'd need from soaps,deodorants,screw drivers,all kinds of apparel, cds cassettes at throw away prices and the rest you see in the pictures to follow. A very good timepass on a lazy saturday afternoon. Have heard that you get real good bargains early in the morning, but who wants to wake up early on a saturday morning!